It's Ramadhan! So you'll be getting closer with Eid Mubarak we call it as 'Victory Day's because we're strong enough for fasting around a month. Based on our culture, we'll be gathering with all families and just sharing stories about everything.
From family gathering itself, we can get many things! Here I give you pros and cons of family gathering.
pros: we'll be getting know our family members better after sharing things,
rebounding relationship between family member, most important and excited thing: pocket money from ones older than you.
cons: your family will ask you tons of classic and sometimes annoying questions, with no mercy. Here I rate most common questions I get: as a girl how to handle it!
- Wah makin gendut ya sekarang. Naik berapa kilo? // wow you're getting fatter than before. How much your weight right now?
Physical appearance is very important, and they know that you're changed! your weight, your hair style, even your pimples. Like seriously, they know things changed on you!
how to handle it: "Well, I'm genuinely happy right now so yeah I'm getting fatter. Anyway, I love your clothes! Looks good on you! Where did you buy it?" My favorite trick is changing the topic, so s/he will talk about himself/herself.
- Gimana kuliahmu?// How's your college life?
If you're a freshman year, this is the most common question. Feels like your whole family want to know about you survive in 'the real world', but honestly they want to know about your love story in college life.
how to handle it: tell them about what you learned from your professor, completely. Just answer it with serious answer, and they'll leave you with nodded and "Oooh... "
- Gimana skripsimu?// How's your thesis?
for senior year, your colleagues will ask you many times about your thesis like 'have you finished chapter 1? How about chapter 2?' they simply want to know, when will you graduate. Basically they ask this question because want to show their sympathy, but sometimes it can be kind of pressure and intimidation.
how to handle it: answer it politely plus diplomatically like, "Yeah still on my progress. Please don't forget to support me, OK?"
- Udah punya pacar? kapan dikenalin? // Do you have a boyfriend? When will you introduce to us?
This is a legend question, I mean my family members ask this since when I was on high school. Feels like they expect to have a boyfriend long time ago. But yeah, I think I can't accomplish their hope.
how to handle it: I usually answer it with a big smile, "well, I don't have time for maintaining relationship because I need to finish my college first." usually they'll started to give me advice how important to have a potential boyfriend, but I don't really care because I know what I want.
- Kapan nikah? // When will you married?
This is one of a classic question too (but I haven't gotten this question--yet). But, I learned how family members asked it to my older sister continually. Usually this condition when you have a potential boyfriend, you already finished your college, or you have a great job based on your expertise.
how to handle it: my sister usually answer, "Well, my boyfriend and I work our best to be better so we can make sure that our life will be better." Diplomatic and pleased everyone who heard that.
Honestly, I completely understand that my family members just want to getting closer me so they ask several polite questions. But, sometimes make me (personally) uncomfortable and intimidated.